Just a lost soul looking for love

To all the lost souls who have forgotten to believe in the immensity of love. – L.E.S.

Girl’s open letter

Boy’s response to the open letter

I read the girl’s letter first last week and though we share the same sentiments, it’s a sad reality that there are cynical people in this world who will find something negative in a very hopeful letter. I could quote here dozens or even hundreds of quotations about love and finding the right man but really what all women want is to have someone who will love them back! There’s nothing wrong in dreaming or hoping, what’s wrong is settling when you know in your heart and you believe that God has prepared the best for you!

At times the wait may feel like such a drag and that sometimes you just wanna give up because you can’t see the end of the road nor the horizon. Sometimes it feels like it’s just an Oasis, something we so badly want that makes us question whether it is real or just a figment of our imagination. Everyday, when I wake up I think to myself  ”Someday I will meet the man that God has prepared for me” and at the end of the day I tell myself  ”Maybe today’s just not that day” but the hope for tomorrow is still there. I admit that sometimes that hope has wavered, and my faith in love has been like the sands in the shore that is changed by every wave, but my faith in God and my belief that He is working on something great for my life has always been strong and sturdy, unwavering and consistent. Reading those two letters have inspired me to write my own – Love letter to my future husband. Read the rest of this entry »

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Think Different.

It’s been exactly 7 months and 3 days since I last posted here in my blog. It’s not to say that I have lost interest, nor faith, nor hope..because that is what this blog is all about. I have just been too busy reading other’s blogs on how they are in their own ways changing the world, that I forgot to take the time to write down what I myself have been doing in my own small way.

My love for Sophia Bush is not a hidden fact. I love that woman to pieces! Both her and B.Davis (her alter-ego) have been with me growing up. For 8 seasons, i have followed both their lives and they never cease to amaze me. They’re both fiercely independent, loyal, brilliant, beautiful and brave. I’d like to believe that I share those same traits with them. She has encouraged and inspired me to care more for the environment and to believe that every little thing we do can affect someone’s life. We can change the world and I am proud to call myself one of her Little Voices.

Today marks my 2 year anniversary living independently here in Singapore, it has been both challenging and fun and even though at times quite tiring and depressing, the good times always outweigh the bad times. In the 2 years I have been here I was exposed and converted into becoming a “Greenie” I love nature and the outdoors, there’s just something so calming and peaceful when you’re in the wilderness but my love for nature used to end at that – admiration. But now i’ve realized that we have to take action!

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Tell Me Why

I’m sick and tired of your attitude…

Taylor Swift is Fearless and it’s clearly reflected in her album and I love her for that! I may not be able to write songs or a book to express my thoughts and feelings but I at least can quote her song…

Now, you tell me why…

I took a chance, I took a shot
And you might think I’m bulletproof but I’m not
You took a swing, I took it hard
And down here from the ground, I see who you are

I’m sick and tired of your attitude
I’m feeling like I don’t know you
You tell me that you love me then you cut me down

And I need you like a heartbeat
But you know you got a mean streak
Makes me run for cover when you’re around

And here’s to you and your temper
Yes, I remember what you said last night
And I know that you see what you’re doing to me
Tell me, why?

You could write a book on how
To ruin someone’s perfect day

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Tough Love

I know how bad it feels to get your heart broken that I don’t want to wish it on anyone. Not even to the one who broke my heart.

You know the saying that sometimes we need to learn it the hard way? Well, I’ve always learned things the hard way, I have a problem with separation, moving on and acceptance. I tend to dwell on things a little longer than is to be expected.

7 years.

It has been 7 long years since I got my heart broken and if i remember correctly it has been 7 years as well since i’ve started my own blog. I’ve always loved writing but it has never been public, i tend to keep a journal or a notepad where I can freely write my thoughts whenever i feel like it and thanks to my ipod i now have an electronic notepad too. At the time when there was a huge craze about blogs I started an online journal of my own via LiveJournal. In there, i wrote down all my feelings, that’s where I poured out all the hurt and pain I felt after a break-up and in that blog i also posted the different ways I’ve tried to move on and the different people who have helped me to move on.

I pour out my heart and soul into every writing i do and whatever entry you might have read from me, is clearly an expression of what i was feeling at the moment i was writing it down. At this moment there are 6,791,061,399 people in this world… Read the rest of this entry »

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Between Order and Randomness

It’s been awhile since my last post. I have been too busy with work, travels abroad, touring my friends, shifting houses and a lot of other things have happened.

Amazing still it seems…I’ll be 23.

I’m at a stage in my life where I need to put some order in my life, put some things in perspective, plan for my future and all the things that comes with growing up. But there’s also a part of me that lives for the randomness and spontaneity that life has to offer. The adventures, self-discoveries and new journeys I can take.

I’m scared and excited. I’m happy and sad at the same time. I feel so loved and yet i feel so alone.  It’s such an oxymoron.

Another year has passed, and I hope that year has made me a little wiser..

And so in anticipation of the new year that is my 23rd birthday, I decided to just post 23 random things that people may or may not know about me…

1. I’ve never been drunk.

2. I have a birthmark at the back of my head.

3. I’m in love with Brooke Davis and the actress who plays her, Sophia Bush “and if you need to know why i love her, i can go on all night!”

4. I got a full ride scholarship in college and my family didn’t have to spend a single centavo (even my allowance was paid for! :p)

5. When i was in grade school i was asked to join a declamation contest at the last minute. I went there complete with props and dressed up as our national hero, Jose Rizal to give his farewell speech and won an award for it.

6. With just one song my mood can change. Musical directors from my favorite tv shows are simply the best!

7. I like listening to indie music, those undiscovered yet talented singers and knowing that i was listening to them already way before they went mainstream

8. I didn’t how to drink tablets (still can’t take those big ones :p) until last year.

9. My cure for everything = Gatorade + Chocolate mousse

10. I love the combination of chocolate and mint

11. I tend to memorize quotes

12. Grey’s anatomy is my release.. I watch it when i want to laugh and i watch it when i feel like i really need a good cry.

13. I’m a frustrated writer

14. I’m allergic to aspirin, spices and all things unfresh! :p

15. I wanted to be a pre-school teacher

16. I love giving talks and trainings that help bring out the best in people (proud to be a BESTMADE leader)

17.  I haven’t tried smoking and i have no plans of trying

18. Me and God are close!

19. The combination of buses and rain makes me cry.

20. I don’t know how to swim, drive nor ride a bike.

21. I don’t have a sport but i love watching sports.

22. I have never received a bouquet of flowers. (it’s sad I know..hahaha)

23. I would do anything for my family and friends.

Let’s see if in the next year I will be able to cross out some of the random things I’ve listed out…

Until then I’ll be listening to Jimmy Eat World till midnight!

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I miss you…

I miss you so bad…just a very random moment, i suddenly thought of you and found tears falling down my eyes from missing you so damn much! For weeks i have been content and happy and i even caught myself quite a few times laughing and smiling for no reason at all.. Then once again, you plagued my mind and wormed your way into my heart and all the hurt from loving you too much was once again woken up from their deep slumber…looks like tonight is gonna be a long night again.

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Dream Job or Dream Boy?

Love is intentional
Love is a choice
Love will be tested

They say you can’t help or choose who you love, that may be true with regards to feelings and lately i see myself loving Julian more than Lucas because we share the same mentality and he put it into words perfectly…

You choose whether or not you open your heart to love.

I never pictured myself in Marketing more or less Sales, i just thought it’s not for me…it’s not me. The fear of setting yourself a quota and not meeting it could be one reason but mostly because i’m not a money-driven person. I do things, because i like it, i enjoy it whether or not it will be financially beneficial for me. I never wanted nor saw myself in this field and look at me now. I didn’t think i would enjoy it but i am, maybe because i’m more on the conceptual and strategic marketing and positioning rather than hard selling.

A lot of people have told me that i would make a good salesman because i have the PR skills and the convincing power to go along with it and i never actually believed them until i literally saw myself selling and making sales (plural form). Selling is hard, yes, but if i know the product and i believe in the product i am selling there’s no reason why selling that would be such a hard job.

My boss on other hand is what i would call a good salesman because even if he’s not 100% into the product he could still get sales. There’s a part of my job i absolutely hate and it’s the part where i have to lie. It’s not a harmful lie, you can call it a white lie if you want but there are times i have to sugar-coat the truth in order to get a good deal or purchase and i feel guilty for it sometimes and it’s such a challenge for me because i try so hard to be as truthful as possible.

I think the influence or saleability of things have a lot to do with the packaging. Though it’s true that beauty is only skin deep and that we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, we must admit that if we don’t like the way it looks, oftentimes we wouldn’t give it the time of day. When i met my boss, i knew i would buy him right away…He had the right packaging and the content to match it that it didn’t take much convincing…Consider it sold!

I’ve decided that i should also start looking at and working on my saleability and market value. If i wanna be out there i should be waiting in hope and joy! Why not apply my work and what i’ve learned in my personal life? I have to learn how to market and present myself in such a way that people will take the time to look and learn more about me. Just like in marketing, sometimes you really have to make time and invest on yourself.

But in the end, we should still remember that no matter how good the packaging might look, the most important thing is still what’s inside.

Looks can be deceiving…

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You make me smile again…

hmmm...

hmmm...

Oh you make me smile again…

Even after my MacDreamy crashed on the floor, the Lord still gave me a reason to smile again. Though i’m not really sure if I should be happy about this or not..hahaha! This is torture! I asked God for a sign, I thought we had an agreement, now I don’t know if God and I had agreed or is it just me wanting to take the pen again from God’s hands? Is He testing me, or does He want to tell me something?

I miss my friends..i miss having them around so I can tell them everything even the minute details that happens in my everyday life, but i’m glad that distance nor time has separated me from my friends. I called a very dear friend of mine just to tell her this story and it feels like we’re just in the same place and that they are not very far away from me..I can’t wait till I get home! I’m sure they’ll make me smile even more!!!

*Couldn’t help but post a picture..I was wearing green too..it just blended well

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Boys With Girlfriends

I know better not to be friends with boys with girlfriends.

I hate cheaters, but over the weekend though, I think I somehow had a slight idea of how it feels to be a cheater. I know it’s wrong, but sometimes something takes over us and we just wanna be wild, spontaneous, do something out of the ordinary and be bad. I’ve always had this thing for singing “I Wanna Be Bad” by Willa Ford and “Sexy, Naughty, Bitchy” by Tata Young at the top of my lungs with all my feelings poured out into those songs..so let me just quote a few lines from them to show you what i mean…

I Wanna Be Bad – Willa Ford

Cuz you make me wanna misbehave
I wanna be bad
You make bad look so good
I got things on my mind
I never thought I would
I, I wanna be bad (bad)
You make bad feel so good
I’m losing all my cool
I’m about to break the rules
I, I wanna be bad

Sexy, Naughty, Bitchy – Tata Young

I pick all my skirts to be a little too sexy
Just like all of my thoughts they always get a bit naughty
When I’m out with my girls I always play a bit bitchy
Can’t change the way I am sexy naughty bitchy me

I like all of my shorts to be a little too shorty
Unlike all of my guys I like them tall with money
I love all of my nights to end a little bit nasty
Can’t change the way I am sexy naughty bitchy me

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Goal for 2010

Christine will be thin by 2010.

I am officially starting that goal beginning today. I bought a new pair of pants a month ago because my clothes don’t fit me anymore…and earlier today while getting ready for work, i found out that my new pair of pants don’t fit me now!!! If i gained weight before, this only means that i gained weight again. tsk tsk tsk…

It’s time for a new routine, lifestyle and a new diet. I have to start working-out again. This can help me to jump start my savings but this diet doesn’t mean i will be depriving myself to all things delicious! There will be no condemnation in this diet, instead I will follow this simple rule…

If you feel guilty, don’t eat it.

If you eat it, don’t feel guilty…

Be thankful you have something to eat.


Now I really need to find a new diversion for my stress, bingeing and over-eating just won’t do now…

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